Has anyone gone through this?

[luci_73]

My family has to put my grandmother into a elderly home, because we feel that she cant deal with stuff anymore. she is losing her mind(memory) and she has " old timers disease" please forgive on this I know that the disease is not called this but right now i cant spell the correct wording. I just hope that when i get to be that age that the scientists actually will have cured this problem. for everyone of us, and other diseases. Can you relate have you gone through this yourself??? Many people believe that there are cures already for cancer,aids and other major diseases.But because each of the diseases get so much in funding for finding the cure and the companies that make medication for the people who have such "uncurable diseases" make too much $$$$ they wont release the cures to us. My wish is that these so called money hungry people would put themselves (or that the higher powers that be would place these people)into these situations so that they know what we little people go through and put out the cures for everyone not just the wealthy.

[diegosmom]

Hi,

Okay...This is a hard one for me to write on since I went through this not only once but twice. Both of my great grandmas suffered from this disease. They were both put into a nursing home and were suffering from it there instead of with our family. It is such a tough disease and it's harder on your grandparents then you going through it too. There is the Aricpt, hopefully that's what it's called, that you can look into that is supposed to help those with the disease. A lot more things have been done to look into a cure for the cure to it. They are still trying different drugs and tests to see what can be done for the future...unfortunately. Just remember, although it may seem dim at times, you live for the good mintues that come and go when they remember you. They are there...just talk to them...ask them about old times since that is a lot of what they will remember and just be there for them...That's what they are going to need and know that if you need to talk that there are some of us here that know what you're going through.

Take care!!!

[luci_73]

Yes i know it is harder on those who actually have the disease. But I find it hard too on us seeing the people we love slip away. At this stage in life many say should be the best years of their lives...not having to work, don't need to take care of the family anymore and travel reminise that sort of thing. I have asked her sister to check with her doctor on meds to help her with this disease and all I have been told is that its too late, she's on too many meds already. I have been told that the Doctors know what their doing. Stay out of it.

[Joe]

I have gone through a similar situation with my grandmother, it was back in 1988. I remember she used to call me Jerry which is my fathers name, and she thought I was him. I tried correcting her a few times but I gave up.....she said things like why dont you wear your sunday shoes ...they're good shoes...I paid $2.00 for them that's 2 days pay! (we're talking early 1940's mentality).....and "I'll cook your favorite meal! Pasta and beans (yet again my fathers favorite meal).
She brought up all sorts of stuff regarding my dads childhood.... which was pretty interesting....she was talking about the German invasion of World War 2
and how we have to be ready to run and hit the fields if the sirens go off....just like we did last week.
It's sad that she can remeber everything that happened 60 years ago, but she could'nt seem to figure out who I was.
She lived a pretty good life...she was 89 when she passed away.

[diegosmom]

You have so many found memories. I have only memories that haunt me with my one great grandma. The one day I walked into her room she yelled that I was the Devil coming to get her and take her away. It was an truly awful experience and that was the last time my Grandma, her daughter, allowed me to go visit her. I didn't get a chance to say goodbye or anything.

My other great grandma always used to call me Susie, my mom's name. She always talked about how we were going to go to the store and help out my grandparents. How one day I would run the grocery store and make something more out of my life. Although I knew that she was talking to my mom as a little girl, in her mind, I still went along with it. It was the glimmer and shine in her eyes when she actually knew it was me that I lived for. When we used to go take her for ice cream or when we visited with my husband (Fiance at the time) she understood it was me for about five minutes and then asked when her mom and dad were coming to get her. It was hard to know what time period she would resort to when she talked to us. Then again being 94 yrs old can truly be a test and trying time in your life. I truly miss the both of them and regret not being able to be there for them when they passed. Good bye Great Grandma Helen and Laurie...I love u both.

[Joe]

I guess seeing your loved ones in a senior retirement community center is not one of the things you want to see...many people feel guilty as they think they've abbandoned their loved ones....that's not TRUE!
I guess there are pro's and con's to this.
The Pro's are that professional assistance (hopefully) is available 24/7....if needed....there are plenty of activities and friends to make and so on.
Many times families want to take care of their elders but just cant make ends meet! In many Family's both spouses work fulltime jobs..... then kids and all that comes with it.... sometimes its not possible.....
Remeber that this assistance is a 24/7 job.... no rest ....no holidays ,specially if no siblings are there to help.
Like Hannah's mom said.... the last moments are the ones you want to save in your heart, those are the moments you're always going to remeber.....
they will live with you forever! make the best of it.....
and be grateful that you were there.

[luci_73]

i just want to say thank you for your notes on this subject. i am still greatful that she remembers us but wish that she didn't have this awful disease. on the news tonight they were saying that alzheimer's is the plaque on the tissue on brain. they claim that there is new hope but i won't hold my breath waiting. my biggest fear right now is that my other family members will get it too. bye for now

[Joe]

I know its frustrating, but you cant think about that! you just have to live life and worry about stuff later. Its hard to do......but you have to.

[diegosmom]

Just know we're here for you if you need to talk or if something happens where you just don't understand something....We've been thru it.

[todd]

My grandmother also had the disease. She died a few years ago in the nursing home. She had times when she could remember me. It was during one of those times that she said something that has always stuck with me.

She said, "If there is anything you want to do in life you had better do it now before you end up in one of these places and you can't do anything."

We must remember that we only have one chance at life to get it right. If you have the freedom to drive a car, go to the store, take a trip, buy a house, start a business, or care for your loved ones, then you should take the time to appreciate what you have and not squander it.